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Thursday, October 31, 2013

Setting Limits


I did something kind of shocking this week (at least it was to me). I returned a stack of unread books to the library instead of renewing them. Also, I finished reading one book and did not start reading another. It's true, for the first time I can remember there is nothing on my currently reading shelf on Goodreads and no stack of books on my nightstand. I even put my Kindle away in a drawer.

Another thing I did that was out of character for me was to delete some classic movies from my DVR without watching them first. I almost couldn't believe I was doing it myself! What was happening to me? Had an alien taken over my body? Was I a victim of some secret government mind control experiment? Or is there an even scarier truth behind these actions?

Could it be that I am actually learning to set limits for myself? I thought that day would never come but I think it's true.

I have always been aware and even admitted here that I have had difficulty setting limits. The funny thing is that it is only now that I'm beginning to overcome this difficulty that I have any insight into it. The way I see it now, I had a very valid, logical reason for not setting a lot of limits in the past and that is this: I wasn't sure what I wanted.

As a person who wasn't sure what she wanted I think I was perfectly justified in my pursuit of more possibilities than I could possibly realize. I think it was my sacred duty to bite off more than I could chew. I even think it was not only advisable but necessary that I so often traveled from one extreme to another.

However, now I believe I have explored enough terrain that I feel comfortable choosing one path over another. I think I have seen enough of the big picture that I am able to decide which details I want to focus in on.

This doesn't mean that I will never read a book or watch a movie or try something new ever again. It just means that I finally feel that what I am doing right here and right now is enough. It means that, at least for now, I am ready to stop exploring and start getting somewhere.

4 comments:

  1. Something is in the air. I've been going through this.

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    1. Oh, good, I'm not alone! Thanks so much for the comment, MC. :)

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  2. Definitely - I've been in sorting/chucking mode for most of this year :)

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    1. Sorting/chucking mode is a great way to put it, Judy! :)

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